Confessions on a gym floor...

I was a cheerleader.
Oh yes. Yes, indeed I was.

* L...A...*

Impressionable at a young age by the popularity and prestige of those bouncy blue eyed blondes, I felt it was my calling, my ponytail flying through the air in perfect basket tosses…

STOMP

My teenaged limbs perfecting even the most difficult tumbles on the gymnasium floor, my voice singing out in spirit cheers…

* L... A...*

The reality itself, however, was quite different

* L...A...N...… *

But I...
STOMP

...I was always going to be a cheerleader.

* L-A-N-G-L-E-Y! *

I could talk of nothing else before I started high school. I'd sit on the sidelines of The Gorgeous' basketball games, just for a glimpse of these glamorous creatures, resplendent in green and gold (c'mon, whose school colours were ever flattering?)

*Langley!*

*FLUTTER OF POMPOMS*

But, sadly LSS never had those same blonde haired blue eyed Ked wearing beauties. Stuck on the border of the Township and the City, tucked alongside farms and fields, we were the school of misfits. But we tried, dammit. Did we ever. Our basket tosses took months to perfect (well, until we accidentally dropped AJ and she cracked her coccyx), we had the cheers and steps down to perfectly synchronised routine but somehow it was that other school, with their sleek blonde haired dancers, skirts brushing against lithe thighs, who gained the most attention and made us yell just that little bit louder.

We had the spirit. We just lacked all the charisma, the sparkle, the je ne sais quoi...Then the pretty girls joined the dance squad, it didn't matter they couldn't dance, they weren't there for their ability, pouting and shaking through difficult dance routines until a half hearted finish to the crowd’s adoration.

And we sat, one leg crossed over the other, pom poms to our sides, pounding the gym floor with the palms of our hands until they stung...

*We want...*

Slap Slap

While the boys ran up and down the court, dribbling, running and passing...

*Two points!*

Slap Slap